Beat the Survival Game To Achieve Self Actualization

I don't know about you, but I spent a lot of years struggling to
find a way to make time for self actualization.  It always seemed
like survival issues got in the way and stole all the energy I needed
to achieve my higher needs and goals.  I call this syndrome…

Maslow's hierarchy Blues
There were other symptoms too.  My relationships suffered because
of stress and low energy.  I could barely even find time to
learn or study let alone contemplate or meditate.  Possibly it was
made a little more difficult by the fact that I had 6 children and
because of that my wife couldn't work much.  I also never went to
college before starting a family.  With all this working against me
how could I achieve self actualization?

My story is a glaring example of what Abraham Maslow, eminent
psychologist and researcher, found when he interviewed people who
were self – actualized.  He developed the theory that people have a
hierarchy of needs.  When a need isn't met on a lower level, it's
much more difficult or even impossible for them to evolve to more
mature or self actualized states.  

Whether or not the theory of a "hierarchy" of needs holds true, it
seems to be a universal experience that some needs are more basic
than others and when they are not met adequately they stifle personal
growth.  Self actualization must stand on a foundation that is more
or less stable.  

The basic needs are a healthy body, security and satisfying
relationships.  To the extent that we are not able to adequately meet
these needs, we are doomed to a treadmill existence.  We are trapped
in a system that requires all of our available energy to meet basic
needs and none is left for self actualization.  

In order to beat this system consider approaching your basic need
aquisition in a way we call Optimal Living.  Put simply, Optimal
Living principles help you achieve the most with the least amount of
energy. Now let's take a look at these
basic physiological needs one at a time.

Take care of your body

We obviously need to breathe, drink, eat, sleep and stay warm enough
and avoid illness.  It would be difficult to put our attention
anywhere else if we didn't have these things in place.  These needs
can be met in a minimal (not enough) or extravagant (too much) way.
There is also the optimal way.  

Consider joining a natural food Co-Op where you can buy wholesome
food at a huge discount at the same time you will meet like minded
friends.  This will help you meet your relational needs.  When you do
it right you will have a body that will carry you through to the
highest level of human actualization and give you many years of
enjoyment instead of pain. Learn about Natural Health.

A roof over your head.

Another physiological need is to have shelter.  You can solve your
shelter needs in a lot of ways, some of them painfully expensive.  If
you want to do this with the least amount of wasted life energy, try
Co-housing.  This is where a group of people are getting together to
lower the costs of housing in many creative ways.  You get to
maintain your freedom, but live well at the lowest possible cost.
Why do you need a lawn tractor in every garage when you can share
one?  The possibilities are endless.  There are organizations set up
to assist you in finding the right solution.  Try looking up "Co-
housing" or "alternative lifestyle" on the Internet.

Stabilize your financial position.  

Security and Safety is the next level of needs to be met.  When your
body is OK and you have adequate shelter, you'll be able to turn your
attention to this.  How can we create income and financial stability
in an optimal way?

A steady income is paramount and is important if you want to meet
any of the other needs of being a human.  Face it, income or money is
the medium of exchange in our society and around the world.  If we
can't resolve this need, we remain stuck in many ways.  The only
alternative is to drop out of society by joining a commune or
monestary.  I don't recommend either.  I feel that the loss of
personal freedom would hamper my ability to meet the higher needs
that exist.  There is also the issue of autonomy which is seriously
challenged in these living situations.  So how to develop a steady
income that doesn't steel all your energy and time?  Plus how can we
avoid the treadmill of 9 to 5 suburban – barely making it – stressed
out existence?

In our effort to obtain financial security we can't give up the ship
of our moral compass.  That creates inner conflict.  Nor can we throw
out the baby with the bathwater.  Finding a right livelihood that
creates income and complements our values is a rare gem.
Fortunately, the Internet is making things possible that couldn't
even be dreamed of before the computer / information age.  Explore
these possibilities.

Affiliate Programs – are web based businesses that allow you to join
up and promote a product or service for a commission.  You can easily
find a program that resonates with you no matter what your interests
are.  If you want to sell vitamins and organic foods, you got it.  If
you want to help people overcome their issues, build better
relationships etc. you got it.  Another important factor to consider
is, don't put all your eggs in one basket.  Work on creating multiple
self perpetuating streams of income. Learn more about MSI's

Build healthy relationships

This could prove to be the most difficult objective in your quest
for self actualization.  Relationships have a tendency to press all
of our buttons sooner or later.  Knowing what to do with the raw
emotions that can arise in relationships can make or break you.  Why
do you think the divorce rate is way above 50%?  The dating breakup
statistics are even worse.  Even getting along with our children or
parents or siblings is a serious challenge.  All of this potential
conflict can seriously sap your energy and time.

Relationships are complex.  On one hand they meet a basic need of
the individual.  On the other hand they provide a continual challenge
that either catalyzes our personal growth or triggers our issues and
causes alienation and emotional pain.   Negotiating the perilous
waters of relationship is much safer and more rewarding if we get
some genuine quality assistance and guidelines.  Don't leave it to
chance, there is plenty of great relationship help on the internet.

Join supportive groups.  

Find a group that you can feel comfortable and relate to.  The main
criteria to look for is their "inclusivity" quotient.  Make sure the
group you give your life energy to is not excluding or marginalizing
any other groups or people.  The degree to which they accept and
appreciate all forms of truth and expression is the degree to which
you will be able to grow with them and express yourself freely.

Obviously this would not be a fundamentalist "We are the only way"
type group.  Think about what type of activities you enjoy, your
lifestyle and what you would like to experience.  Find a group or
groups that compliment your criteria at the same time give you
opportunity to stretch or challenge yourself.  Lots of groups can be
found on the Internet, or in our resource pages.

Optimal Living guarantees maximum "lift off" from the gravitational
pull of the basic physiological needs.  By optimal living I mean that
you create a situation that guarantees that these needs are met in an
automatic way.  If not automatic, the idea is to obtain what you need
with the least amount of energy necessary.  Energy is the commodity
of transformation.  Without it you stand still.  Gather it, conserve
it and use it wisely, and you create the optimal conditions for real
lasting growth.

With the right strategy and by paying attention to the hierarchy of
needs, you can make your way to self actualization a much more
pleasant journey.  You will be covering all the bases so you will
experience less surprises and setbacks.  By sewing the right seeds,
you will also have the energy you need.